WillaGirl

2007-11-06T09:37:00.000-07:00

Everything's great!

2007-09-11T10:09:00.000-06:00

Sorry I haven't posted since we got back. Everything is going great, but finding computer time is really hard.
Willa is healthy and happy. She smiles all the time. She seems to love being a part of this family and seems truly attached to everyone, even the dogs.
Here's a picture I took right after we landed in KC.

LA, KC, Here We Come

2007-08-28T22:53:00.001-06:00

Tomorrow we go home! I am so ready. I want my bed, my kitchen; I want to eat a salad and take a shower with my face right under the shower head. I want my dogs. I want to eat fresh fruit. But most of all I want Dennis and Iris. I'm just about to explode in anticipation of seeing them.
Willa passed her medical exam yesterday and our paperwork went through without a hitch at the American consulate today. Tomorrow afternoon we go to the consulate to take an oath (not sure what we actually swear to) and then we head to the airport. Nikki and I will spend the night in LA, and will fly into KC Thursday evening.
Oh I so hope Willa sleeps on the plane.

Willa and Theresa

2007-08-26T21:36:00.000-06:00

L says: I told Theresa I would like to post a picture of her and Willa here. She said:

Your wish is my command. I look kind of scary in this picture, but it's the only one I have of just the two of us. It's Willa's first trip to Starbucks.

Willa's First . . . Starbucks!

2007-08-26T08:34:00.000-06:00

Willa had a very hard night tonight. She hardly napped today and she was crazy clingy all night. I do my best to hold her; I know it helps with attachment. Still I have to go to the bathroom sometimes; I have to clean up. I sat her down for a while and she cried so hard for so long I thought she was going to vomit. I picked her up and that soothed her, but as soon as I put her in her bath, she started screaming hysterically again. I cleaned her quickly and lifted her out of the sink, slippery wet and shiny. When I put her down on the towel I'd laid out on the bed, she started with the screaming again. I leaned over her little naked body and whispered in her ear, "I'm your mommy. I'm not going to leave you." And then, magically, she stopped screaming, closed her eyes, and immediately fell into a deep sleep.

Totally different topic: we finally made a pilgrimage to Starbucks, the three of us. I took plenty of photos since I believe Willa's first trip to a coffee house is quite significant. It was like a Merchant Ivory Starbucks. We sat on a long veranda with big wicker chairs and ceiling fans. There were palm trees and other exotic plants all over. Everyone around us looked interesting: cool gay guys with severe classes, a German woman with purple highlights, a good looking Chinese woman with a fat English novel in her lap. Nikki ate a croissant and stole sips of my iced mocha. Willa kicked her feet and looked around. Chocolate! Coffee! Wheat! The West isn't all bad, right?

Blessings, Pearls, Poems, Bagels and Booze

2007-08-26T04:49:00.000-06:00

Today we started out early, to avoid the heat. We went to a Buddhist Temple, for a baby blessing, which has been the highlight of my trip, tourist-wise. It was crowded, mostly by Chinese, but there were also a few Westerners there having their babies blessed as well. We bought a big bundle of incense and lit the whole thing, leaving the smoldering sticks in a special spot. Later I took Willa before a monk who chanted and tapped a little instrustrument. He dipped a leaf in some cool water and sprinkled it over both of us. Willa was entertained and cooing during the whole event. There are many beggars outside the temple walls. Our guide instructed us not to give anyone money, so I didn't, but it felt kind of heartless to walk past everyone. So inside the temple walls, compassion; outside the temple walls, pragmatism.

After the temple, we went jade shopping, and I bought a small, nice piece of jade for myself and each of the girls. I'm not unhappy to have purchased it, but I'm starting to feel a little played. It seems like every adoptive parent is given the "opportunity" to buy porcelain, jade, and pearls. The sale is pretty high pressure, and for a whimpy Midwesterner like myself, rather uncomfortable. After you purchase your jade, you're taken to the corner of the store, where an old man, whom I was told is one of the best caligraphers in China, will write a poem for your daughter and then make it into a wall hanging. I joined the line and had this done for Willa, and even though I felt like it was expected of me to do this, I didn't mind because the work he did was truly lovely and there was something gracious about this old man that rose above the dog-and-pony-show atmosphere of the day. He was reed thin and wrinkled and smiling.

Tomorrow is a medical exam for Willa, something the U.S. government requires before she can come to the U.S. Then we're off to the pearl market. You know, I kind of wanted to buy some pearls here in China, but I just don't know if I can face another dog-and-pony-show. I'm in a very small travel group and wriggling out of planned activity can be rather awkward, but I just might.

Tonight, we're ordering delivered food from Danny's Bagels, which is reputed to have very good Western food. Willa is a bit of a challenge at meals since she grabs everything! Last night I had some nice Thai green curry, but the whole bowl of it nearly landed on my lap several times. After food from Danny's, I'm hitting the mini bar. I haven't done that the entire trip, and I say it's high time.

And I still haven't gotten my latte yet.

Pictures!

2007-08-25T21:28:00.000-06:00

Laura says: Sorry if one of these is sideways. I dunno how to fix it. Nikki looks so old!

& Later: Ok. I figured some photo stuff out maybe, and I'm adding 2 new versions of the same photos that are already on here.

The Chinese Ain't Afraid of Shit

2007-08-25T08:53:00.000-06:00

Nicole and I were nearly jumping on the beds we were so excited to check into the Victory Hotel in Guangzhou. We were starting to feel like we'd spent our entire lives at the Gloria Hotel in Nanchang. Actually, I'm glad I experienced Nanchang, but our hotel room was tiny and there just wasn't that much to do when you don't know that language and don't have any transportation.

So now we're in Guangzhou, which is very Westernized and no one gives a Westerner carrying a Chinese baby even a second look. It's pretty touristy, with lots of cutesy shops that cater to adoptive parents. Every adoptive parent must go to Guangzhou for a few days because that's where the U.S. Consulate is--and that's were you get your baby's passport. The streets here are wide and almost no one drives on the sidewalks, which is kind of nice for a change. There are also big, fat ficus trees growing along the streets and palm trees, too.

I nearly had my first meltdown of the trip today, but managed to pull myself out of it before I had a tantrum on the street: I was out of formula, but not overly concerned about that since there are about a million adoptive parents here. I assumed every other store would have formula. Wrong. If you want pink squeaky shoes or a lady bug dress or cheap hunk of jade to wear around your neck, this is your place. But formula and rice cereal? Nope. None. I was hot and lugging Willa around and asking for formula and no one knew anything about formula. As I was wondering around, the shopkeepers were coming out on their stoops to give me the hard sell on baby clothes. I just wanted to shake them and I say, "I don't want any freaking baby shoes. My kid needs formula!!!!!" Finally, I stumbled by the lobby of the White Swan, another hotel that caters to adoptive parents. I went into the lobby, found a cluster of Americans holding Chinese kids,and blurted out, "Can somebody he! lp me find formula!" I felt like a freaking idiot, and I really thought I was just going to cry if somebody didn't help me. Fortunately, a woman that I knew from my hotel in Nanchang took pity and pointed me toward a grocery store. I was so traumatized, I bought far more rice cereal and formula than I'll ever need on this trip, but I felt the need to stockpile, just in case. To calm my nerves, I also grabbed handful of chocolate bars.

Willa did great on the plane trip, which was nice. She laughed and smiled at everyone. She also made a huge poop that scented the entire cabin. I tried to be cool, like it was not my kid who did that terrible thing, but I squirmed a bit as I watched the nostrils of the people around me start to flare. It's my impression that the Chinese are not as sensitive about sh**t as Americans are though. Odors, they seem to handle.

Bad thing about the Chinese: they drive on the sidewalk.
Good thing about the Chinese: they're not afraid of sh**t.

World's Largest Ferris Wheel; Don't Slow Down; $2 dinner

2007-08-24T08:26:00.000-06:00

The trip to the park today was a quicky since it was so hot. We got our driver to take us around Nanchang in the air conditioned van. We saw the world's largest Ferris wheel, which wasn't working because it was too hot. (I wouldn't have gone anyway.) I tried to get a good picture, but couldn't fit it all in. It's so big, it takes 30 minutes to finish one rotation. Crazy, huh? I guess there's some worry about what will happen if someone has a heart attack at the top of the thing, but so far that hasn't happened. After the Ferris wheel we cruised around some brand new middle class neighborhoods--condos in high rise (five to ten stories) buildings. They're very slick in that way new American structures are slick. Ho-hum but tidy. There seems to be millions of those communities sprouting up on the edges of Nanchang.

Willa is eating so much, I'm almost worried. I don't mean I'm worried there's something wrong, I just mean I think she's trying to make up for everything she's missed in the the first few months of her life. Iris was a good eater, but she didn't do anything like this. The other night we ordered steamed egg for the babies--imagine a flan you might make in a nine inch pie pan. And she ate probably a third of it and would have eaten more if I'd let her.

Today I told Nikki that everyone is warning me that Guangzhou is hotter than Nanchang and she looked puzzled for a minute then said, "How is that possible?" I guess we'll find out soon.

Those of you who have heard the stories about crossing the streets in China: it's just as crazy and scary as you can imagine. Richard's advice is not to even think about crossing a street without him. He says every Chinese motorist is an insane killer. Traffic lights are just suggestions, not something you can depend on everyone around you obeying. And while cars will sometimes slow down for pedestrians, scooters drivers don't even pause. When I first got here, I marveled at how young the population seemed. At first I assumed this was because there continues to be a high birth rate. Now I know that as soon as someone starts to slow down, they get mowed down by some sort of vehicle.

Things here are crazy cheap. Last night dinner for four adults and three kids cost six dollars. We had a ton of food. We could've fed three more people easily. On one hand, that's kind of fun (I can't wait to tell everyone my dinner cost two dollars!!!), but on the other hand, it feels uncomfortable to have so much money that dinner out is nothing, nothing, nothing and then walk home bloated and full, passing little kids sitting on the stoops of shops eating their tiny dinners from bowls in the unbearable heat. (That was kind of a tangled sentence, but you get the idea.)

Authorized Post: Size 6 mo now, 9 mo soon

2007-08-23T22:26:00.000-06:00

Sorry I haven't posted in a couple of days. Between doing paperwork and Willa's increasing attachment to me (a good thing) it's harder for me to get to the business center in my hotel and write.
Willa continues to do amazingly well. She's very attached to me, wants to be held all the time. This is a good thing in adoption; it shows she sees me as her mother, not as just another in a series of caretakers. She's growing so fast. For those of you itching to buy baby clothes: she fits into a six month size, but I anticipate she will be into nine-months sizes soon.
A big disappointment for me: because of heavy rains and flooding in the countryside we were not able to go to Willa's orphanage. If there was one thing I wanted to do on this trip, it was see her hometown and orphanage. I know I can come back sometime and see it on another trip, but China is changing so quickly, it may be a very different village in just a few years. I really wanted to be able to tell her what her home is like.
Nikki has recovered from her travelers stomache and is able to get out and do things. Today we're going to "August 1" Park and then may do a little shopping. Since Willa's home province is known all over China for its fine ceramics, we went to a nice ceramics shop yesterday and bought Willa a very nice little vase as a keepsake of her home. Afterwards, we went to a WalMart supercenter. Usually I boycott WalMart, but I broke my rules this time to experience the Chinese version. It was pretty wild: multiple floors and lots and lots of people.
I am so damned sick of being hot. There. I said it. I hate to be a spoiled American and complain, but I just have to. Lugging a hot, sweaty baby around in the heat gets pretty tough. I'm also tired of fried rice for every meal. There, another complaint. Still, in spite of the heat and mountains of fried rice, I'm honestly having a fantastic time. I feel great, have tons of energy, and am in love with Willa.
Tomorrow we leave for Guangzhou, which is much more Westernized than Nanchang. Word on the street is, there's a Starbucks down the street from our hotel. I'm counting the minutes until I get my hands on a latte!

Willa Getting Attached!

2007-08-23T17:29:00.000-06:00

Hey folks, this is an unauthorized post. I don't know why we haven't heard from Theresa. Dennis mentioned there was a storm in the area, so maybe the internet went out. Really that's pure speculation. I continue to send your posts to Theresa by email.

I called Dennis yesterday to see if he'd talked to her and to hear about Iris's first day of kindergarten. Here's what I found out:

Dennis had been calling Theresa at least daily, but couldn't yesterday because the phone company cut off his long distance service. It seems he'd run up quite a bill calling China. They offered him Int'l long distance for $10.95 a month and 10 cents a minute, and agreed to make it retroactive. Better for the finances, worse for communication because it was going to take around 24 hours to give him long distance access again.

Meanwhile, he reported that Willa had become more demanding of Theresa's time and attention and was already seeming to understand that she was "not just another orphanage worker." Willa cries if Theresa leaves the room. Good news.

Iris had her first day orientation at French Immersion kindergarten with Dennis. She told Dennis she loved it. When they were leaving the teacher said "au revoir," and Iris responded, "Actually, I don't know that much French."

That's all I've got for you. --Laura

Hungry Girls

2007-08-21T05:46:00.000-06:00

This will have to be short since Richard is taking us shopping in a few minutes.

First, Willa just continues to be wonderful. As she's getting more comfortable with us, she's feeling like she can make a fuss or two, but overall she's just doing great. I've never seen a baby eat like she's eaten today. She takes whole bottles in minutes, a then fusses for more. I swear she's grown noticeably since we got her 48 hours ago. It's funny to see the difference in the two babies in our group: Willa is chunky(at least by Chinese orphanage baby standards), a good eater, a clown, and really pretty mellow; the other baby is delicate, a bit shy, and a picky eater. Both are beautiful and healthy and great girls, but so different.

Today I had my first experience at being a spectacle. Richard took us to a well known pavilion that draws lots of tourist groups. Willa decided she was starving and so I had no choice but to sit down and feed her right on the steps to the pavillion. This large group of Chinese tourists came by (these groups are always lead by a young woman carrying a yellow flag) and started firing a million questions at Richard. They were from a region that doesn't have a lot of adoption and knew nothing of the issue. They wanted to know what was going on, how it was that I had a Chinese baby. When he explained they smiled, called Willa a "lucky baby", and continued to gawk at me while their guide tried get them interested in the history of this mural that was on the wall behind me.

Nicole got a dose of Chinese medicine today. Her stomach has been upset and I've been dosing her with Imodium. Richard shook her head at this, went right out and bought her some mysterious green Chinese medicine that comes in glass vials and tastes really nasty. Nicole sucked it down dutifully and in about two hours sat up, announced she was hungry, and has been feeling much perkier.

More tomorrow.

"Snowflakes that Melt on Your Nose and Eyelashes"

2007-08-20T09:39:00.000-06:00

Today, in a hot, sweaty Civil Affairs office crowded with big, goofy Americans and their Chinese babies, Willa became ours officially. It was a morning of waiting around and signing papers, sliding presents to officials when Richard gave us the nod, and trying to keep my wits about me so that I didn't loose my purse full 'o cash or my folder full of Important Stuff. It was pouring buckets outside, but steamy hot in every office we visited. Still it was a lovely day in many ways, especially since we got to spend some time with the staff members of her little orphanage who traveled 4 hours to see their two little ones off. Of course there was a huge language barrier, but somehow we were able to communicate and connect. It was absolutely clear these people loved Willa and Mary Frances to pieces. They kissed them over and over, laughed at their little expressions, each took turns holding and bouncing the girls one last time. Both girls are in great shape, on target de! velopmentally, and just very happy babies. I owe these people so much for the good care they took of Willa. They left Willa very sweet present: her nanny embroidered her Chinese name on a little red pouch that she filled with ceramic pieces made from the Jiangxi soil. They said it was to remind her that she will always be Chinese.

They told me on Willa's most recent paperwork that she slept from 7:30 p.m. to 5:30 a.m. and they were right almost to the minute. I awoke several times last night out of excitement; Willa slept soundly through the whole night. When she awoke, she seemed to just want to snuggle with me for a while. She put her head on my shoulder and we watched the boats on the Gan while the room grew light. Then she pounded down about a half a box of rice cereal, and, just to show me how well adjusted she really is, she pooped. This is a big milestone for adoptive babies, who often refuse to poop for days after they meet their new parents.

Nikki was again a trooper, sitting patiently through this steamy, tedious morning. She's with Willa now in the room. Willa and Nikki bonded over The Sound of Music: they both lit up when that Julie Andrews began singing. Willa laughed when Nikki started singing. Then Willa fell asleep when the Von Trap children began singing some horrible, sappy song that I'm trying to blot my mind as I write.

I love your comments everyone. I can't wait for you to meet Willa.

Willa is Wonderful, of Course

2007-08-19T08:11:00.000-06:00

We have her!! And she's amazing. I've heard so many horror stories of unhealthy, unhappy, terrified babies. I was fully prepared for the worst. In fact, she's healthy, relaxed, curious, and already eating. Could I ask for more?
Richard arranged to have the babies come to the hotel, which made for a lovely, calm introduction. Her nanny handed her over to us and she was completely relaxed about it. She has several boils on her head, but they appear to be healing. Other than that, she's in great shape. She doesn't even have a cold. She has a couple of inches of hair now and is, by American standards, quite small for an 8 month old. But she appears to be developmentally in very good shape: she makes eye contact, smiles, is curious, can roll over, and can scoot a little.
Tonight we took her to dinner. She ate congee and enjoyed the attention she was getting.
Tomorrow we'll be doing a lot of paperwork, so I don't know if I'll be able to post much. I'll try to send photos soon.
Nicole is babysitting in the room for the first time and she was quite nervous about it, so I promised her I wouldn't take long. I'll write more later.

[About 4 hours before, Theresa sent this:]
The babies are on their way. They should be here in less than an hour, assuming the nannies don't get caught up in traffic. I'm down in the hotel business center doing this to kill time. If I sit in the room waiting for the phone to ring I'll certainly go crazy.

Richard, our guide, is wonderful. He took us out to a grocery store this morning to get baby supplies. I love going to grocery stores when I'm out of the country. And this place didn't disappoint. It was large and well stocked. Nikki and I both totally enjoyed ourselves. I could have stayed for much longer looking at spicy Chinese jerky, and baby cups, and unfamiliar packages of snacks. It was good to get out for an adventure since we've been inside a lot. The weather is cooling down some, which made walking around outside much more enjoyable, though the air pollution is still oppressive. Apparently a typhoon is going to hit the coast here sometime soon; it won't be dangerous for us since we're inland but we still can expect lots of rain and winds. It should be fun to watch the weather from our 16th floor room.

Nikki has been an amazing traveling companion. This trip hasn't been easy, but she has hung in there and been a very good sport. Luckily, we get a large assortment of English language tv channels, which has delighted her. We have seen a number of very cheesy American romantic comedies in the last couple of days. That's been fine with me too, since focusing on anything is very difficult for me right now. Even writing this entry is a bit difficult. I keep thinking I hear babies in the lobby nearby and that I should jump up and leave.

Ok. Ok. I'm going.

I'll try to send pictures, if possible, as soon as I can.

Nanchang vs. Gary, Indiana

2007-08-18T21:55:00.000-06:00

We seem to have recovered pretty well from our trip. Nikki and I slept and slept yesterday and still managed to sleep all night too. We feel pretty good. Yesterday we did manage to get out and take a walk along the Gan River, which is right across from our hotel. Nanchang isn't exactly pedestrian friendly, ( at least by American standards) but we manage to see some really interesting sights and not get run over by a car, scooter, or bike on our outing. The Gan is huge, huge, huge, maybe four or five times wider than the Mississippi. There are all kinds of vessels moving up and down the river, day and night. There are huge rusty barges filled with sand, funky little cruise ships, and tiny row boats that look like they'll surely get swept away. The river is pretty polluted and there's trash on the shore. In spite of that, there were whole families splashing away in the river and having the best time. Nanchang is an industrial city--gritty, dirty, fast-paced. Saying I loved it ! would be like saying I loved Gary, Indiana, but still, it's fascinating. I'm glad we get to experience the real China instead of just seeing the tourist sites. This is Willa's home province and it's good to see what it's really like.

The pollution is difficult for us spoiled Westerners to take. My lungs burned yesterday after we finished our walk. I was happy to get inside and rest in my AC cooled room. It's hard not to feel guilty being in this rather luxurious place when so many people are out in the heat and dirt and grime.

We get Willa this afternoon. It's hard to believe. We've set out all the baby things and they brought the crib into our room today. Weird. Wonderful. But weird.

We've been on our own here, but Richard, our guide will be here soon and I have to admit I'm happy about that. I feel a little insecure here in this country where I don't speak the language.

I'd write more but I've got to get up to the room to wait for Richard's call. Oh my gosh. I just can't believe we get Willa today.

Theresa and Nikki in China

2007-08-17T22:07:00.000-06:00

Hey folks,

Theresa tried to send me an update to post to this blog. She couldn't get to the blog somehow. Unfortunately the email didn't come through with the blog update, but I got a different email from her in which she said:

"My brain is mushy, but I feel pretty good. Nikki is doing great, too. Or as great as can be expected for a person who has just traveled halfway across the globe with a cranky old lady.
We get Willa tomorrow afternoon, about 3 a.m. Sunday, your time. I'm hoping I'll be able to send photos for you to post, too, but I'm not sure I'll be able to do that."

She also encouraged me to continue to email as she was able to get into her account. I emailed her back with the comments that had been posted on the blog by Craig and Lizanne & I will continue to copy any posts you make to the blog until we know she can get onto the blog.

Best wishes,

Laura

And we're off

2007-08-15T10:21:00.000-06:00

I did it. I got everything ready, with time to spare. We're leaving for the airport in about a half an hour.
I miss Iris and Dennis already. I so wish the timing had been different so that we could've experienced this together. I keep giving Iris these big, bone-crushing hugs out of the blue, and I think she's getting rather tired of it.
I'd write more, but I'm too nervous to think; besides I don't really have that much to write about anyway. In a few days, I'll have lots, of course.
Wish us luck!

Wednesday!!

2007-08-14T05:50:00.001-06:00

On Friday, my agency called and said we had to leave Wednesday. Usually you get two to three weeks to prepare, and that's what I was counting on. The last few days have been really crazy. Good. But crazy.

We get Willa at 3:30 p.m. Sunday, Aug. 19. I just can't imagine what that's going to be like.

Nikki and I are traveling solo. We're going from KC to LAX, LAX to Guongzhou, then on to Nanchang. We get into Nanchang on Friday afternoon, which gives us a couple of days to recover from jetlag before meeting Willa.

I'd write more, but there are a million things to do.

Seamus and Wendell

2007-08-02T14:47:00.000-06:00

They just make me so happy. I had to post their pictures.

Not exactly love at first sight

2007-07-21T18:06:00.000-06:00

From reading other blogs, I know that many people rip open their referral envelope, see the photo, and fall in love immediately. Not so for me. I wasn't disappointed or sad or let down. There was nothing negative, really. But I wasn't exactly jumping up and down like a contestant on a game show either.

Hers is one of those referral photos you've seen a million times: shaved head and Michelin man snowsuit, looking rather surprised by the whole ordeal. All of us were sort of stunned at first. The I. broke the silence: she said, "I didn't know she was going to look like that. She's fat!"

We all laughed. Dennis and I looked at her photo over and over again without commenting. We just looked and looked.

The next day, we put her photos up on the fridge. Every time I passed by I looked. I don't think I've ever tried to read any other photo so closely. And there's not much to read, really. That giant snowsuit covers almost everything. Even her shoes are about five sizes too big. There's just her little round head and tiny fists.

Her eyes. Over days, it's those eyes that get me. There's so much life behind them. I see a good mind, a sense of humor; I see a girl who has got some sass. And her little fists, too. I know babies clench their fists a lot, but because I don't have much else to go on, I'm going to let myself believe those clenched fists are more than just baby instinct: she's ready for a fight, this Willa Girl.

2007-07-15T16:01:00.000-06:00

So it's almost been a week since we saw our Willa's face. It's still slowly sinking in. We put her pictures up on the fridge and we look at her hundreds of times a day. She's ours. Really, really ours.

I love her eyes. Or rather the expression in her eyes. She has spark. Like there's someone really wonderful and interesting underneath. She looks like she's ready to pop off that chair and do something outrageous.

Her nannies say she's extroverted, a good eater, and obstinate.

2007-07-10T09:50:00.000-06:00

Here she is. So much for my psychic abilities: she's chubby, bald, and from Jiangxi. Her DOB is Dec. 3, 2006.

2007-07-08T18:19:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow is the big day. By the time I get home from the airport, the referral package will be waiting. We'll all open it together and see our new daughter and sister together.

My prediction:

Sex: girl
Age: 14 months
Home province: Hunan
Hair: lots

We'll see how accurate I am. Dennis think she'll be under a year and from Guandong province. He's basing his predictions on what is most likely; I'm going on a hunch.